Of Free Spirits ..

When it’s funny,

When I am happy,

I laugh out aloud…

When I do well,

Oh! I can tell,

I feel so proud!

When I feel pinched,

And emotionally lynched,

I just cry …

When I feel bored,

And mentally sored,

I sit blank and dry..

When I am thrilled,

With joy, am filled,

I like to sing..

When I feel cheesy,

And want things breezy,

I do a Chandler Bing..

When I am disgusted,

With minds un-dusted,

I move away…

When I am concerned,

And backs are turned,

I register my say..

When I’m confused,

And unclear on facts,

I donot opine..

When I think I know,

That things are ‘So’,

I state, with a sign.

When I know I am wrong,

I donot take long,

To undo my act,

When you ain’t in the right,

And feel ‘sorry’- in a flight,

I’ll forgive, it’s a pact!

When I’m in good cheer,

Tragic hope or fear-

I’ll crack a joke,

When I dun feel I gel,

I won’t bother ring a bell,

With any random bloke!

When I am upbeat,

N music kicks my feet,

I will jump about and dance,

When beat does not click,

Or make my heart tick,

I’ll be Pinochio in France ..

23 hours I can spend,

Without laughing a bend ,

For 60 minutes of ‘my kind’ ..

A lifetime I’ll invest,

In patient search of The Best,

And I will seek, until I Find..

A second of real laughter,

A second of real pain,

A second of real anger,

A momentary rush in vein….

Is life in all its glory!

Is life as it ought to be!

I express a felt emotion:

I am I. And I am FREE.

A real emotion- felt and told,

The Unsabotaged, and the unsold,

Is pure, is sacred, is truly divine.

Use it in random fashion,

Stripped of honest passion,

N It’s spirit you’d undermine.

Go ahead,

Choose to cry,

Choose to Love,

Choose to Lust,

But, Do it coz you so WISH

And not merely coz you Must.

Real Emotion: Real to the person concerned. Is felt within them. Originates there,

And is the sole cause driving their action.

e.g, someone laughing along with a group of ‘social intellectuals’, on a joke about the current crop of the spineless politicians, with no real clue/ concern about the issue in question- just to “gel in” with the group, will never be able to savour the moment, the laughter in the true sense.

Now, the idea is not to prosecute the person for this ignorant action.

It is quite common, natural and human.

The idea is to tell him, that it is Okay to not find it funny. There is no obligation to laugh; that there is greater sense of worth & esteem attached in laughing on a santa-banta joke, if so be it. Only that kind of laughter is therapeutic, and blissful.

Donot negate your identity, by negating your view of life, the world, of reality as you perceive it.

All of us are born with certain energies within us- a very simplistic version of the whole funda of karma and dharma.

Simple Physics:

Energy can neither be created, not destroyed. It simply changes from one form to another. Suppressing your real instincts, your true energies does not finish them off. They just find another vent, after being pumped uncomfortably inside for a long time, until when it can just not be contained anymore.

Why suppress? Live it. Expend it. And move on…

Why, for example, even if some one is excessively promiscuous – maybe beyond the norms of social acceptance- to the point where the society may label them a ‘whore’.. I think the society must give them the space to breathe- as long as their interests donot directly hurt those of others. [e.g reckless sexual behavior, out of consent of the partners, or spreading STD’s – these call for society’s intervention. Nothing else in their private domain does. ]

Oh! Disagree with them. Surely, you can find something fundamentally incorrect in their behavior, but so do ten other people who know you, will find in yours. Why not begin by fixing those-before you go around indulging in these unsolicited acts of social good, and charity.

(here I will digress a little.. again, this was unplanned )

What amuses me most is that once someone was vocally blowing hot and cold about how Homosexual behavior is sinful, coz it destroys the social moral order (Oh, how concerned they were, about the innocent little children around us, who would be impacted by such dirt around them .. !)

And the same person goes ahead a few months later, and is complicit in the most atrociously dirty action ever- maligning a colleague’s reputation and hurting their very identity by means of an evil, dirty plot. (which in rogueland, they might call a “prank” *Oh gawdd that trashy bnehaviour still boils my blood in rage* )

What is sinful, O Lord?

Trying to live a private life on your own terms (unconventional as those might be), without violating those of others?

Or directly invading into someone’s private territory, and deliberately and consciously causing hurt and pain to someone, and deriving satisfaction out of it?

Again, some words I hate.. totally beyond loathing!

Morals and ethics. Coz they represent grossly distorted forms of simple logic, and lend themselves to merry manipulation.

These concepts donot exist. Except in the Land of Lies n deception.

A is A. Is A. Is A.

A ain’t A by vote or majority opinion.

It is A by virtue of being nothing frm B- Z, but A.

It is not ours to tell others what “A” looks like, sounds like… feels like.

Let them decide how they define ‘A’.

Get together if you so desire, with those who share your definition of ‘A’. Coz it will be easiest to make deals with them.

Coz then, u’ll be trading Dollars with dollars. And it is always more complicated to trade dollars with pounds.

How does it relate to this post now…

A is any object, abstract notion, person or anything, that may inspire an emotion, or may itself be one.

I must have my right to define A. You must have yours. If we donot agree on the concept, we must not strike a deal between ourselves.

Again, all freedom granted until it is abused, and infringes upon that of another.

Another thing,

I feel that an emotion when used recklessly loses its spirit- its charm, its potential.

If you express ‘anger’- at the drop of a hat .. without real sufficient cause to do so..

Say, you yell at your junior every now and then, just to ‘rub in’ you status as the boss. When you are really upset with his substandard performance, or shoddy work, your yelling will not hold great impact, coz they are used to it …

*yawn with a curse* would be the response

But if chosen and used carefully, anger well directed and at appropriate timings, can cause a real effect- and be really impactful.

Note the apparently fake quality that creeps in, into the forever smiling, kissing in the air, (with oohs and aahs), socialite-like-personalities … it is tough to make out the real smile from the plastic one … and poor things, are suspected of fake emotions at all times, even when those may be perfectly genuine.

And the same applies to all the other emotions …

To use a very crude analogy, reckless (ab)use of emotions is like picking up ur warmest woolen cloth for simple winter season, and using it, cleaning it… using it, cleaning it … repeatedly… until most of its fabric weathers out .. and it loses its original spirit- purpose or quality, which was ‘warmth’.

Alternatively, one can save it for special occasions, such as the trip to the Himalayas, the Atlantic or heck, any other REALLY cold place u might chose to spend your vacation at. This would be special: the usage would be memorable, coz of the memorable context. You will get the warmth you so badly desire, and only this woolen cloth could have provided you ( which if used recklessly earlier, you would not have at ur disposal Now)

Now, none of the usages can be declared wrong.

It is totally your call.

Option A gives you the advantage of assured usage : what if the Special occasion never does occur in ur entire lifetime. What a Waste! Better use it at a below-capability level – just like any other ordinary woolen cloth.

Option B à Gives u the advantage of the benefit of the real, blissful pleasure that the thing alone has to offer to you- in a way that no other woolen can.

Take your call :)

And have the guts to face the consequences of whatever stand you might have chosen.

That, in the truest sense, is Liberation. That which, no one else but you can accord to your self.

PS. Wondering why this post suddenly? Actually, we have an exam on Monday..

Errr ….I had opened my book. (Organization Design and Development *yawn*)

And I decided to take a ‘break’ ;)

Peace!

The Healing Power of Love .. *To You, Prof. Dumbledore :) *

*sniff sniff* *dry cough*

*sigh-cum-deep drawn sniff*

*gulp—eyes blink in pain, as my throat squirms in revolt*

*lifting each finger with effort, and mouthing a groan-y ‘hhmmm’ to di’s warning that I take care to not let her laptop slip down and shatter* (You see, I’m again holding it high in the air on my lap – it is perpendicularly suspended in mid air, supported precariously on a pair of sick and tired lower limbs, weak with fever – Cant sit up straight, m lying down supine ! – I employ this position often, but today it’s not a choice but a compulsion ..)

You know … *painful sniff again*

I am sick. And worse.. I’m down …not with the sweltering heat of Delhi … but with a Cold!

And I’m trying to figure out where I must have caught it.

Karishma blamed it on our frequent shifts between the AC-ed and Non- AC-ed environments .. no wonder so many people can be seen patting their throats and screwing their noses. This is in the air :( ..

I have strong reasons to believe that I picked it from a happy-go-lucky-go-publicly-coughy-merrily-throwing-cold-viruses-in-the-air co-intern, who insisted upon attending the office -with an EarNoseThroat fully choked with phlegm – every single day! … even though ordinarily he wouldn’t bat an eyelid when bunking office with such ah … CEO-like-elan coz ..and I quote“ this would show them how committed I am… “ :P

Yeah!

As if This place had not given me enough woes already – a (hitherto ) godforsaken project, a cup of Bad-tasting tea everyday .. for which (I recently discovered) they charge us right out of our stipend :P … A sorry sacrifice of whatever little dignity I had walked in with, at the altar of Some people’s Witticisms :( ..

And Now ! ..

The final straw that’s threatening to break the Camel’s back … a disgusting cold- rendering me physically incapable of free mobility, easy breathing, anything!! :(

In this state of half-trance (fever people! .. I have fever!! .. :( ) am almost filled with thoughts of vindictive pleasure *evil grin*

Let me be sick all the way up till Monday, and let me carry the germs back to their native place- My Office… Andddddddd let me gift these to all those whom I wanna get back at :D :D .. by means of unabashed open-mouth coughing and sneezing (yeahh .. could I be more of a blot on the name of my esteemed institute!)

But hang on *stressing her peanut-brain with all her might* … there IS nobody who has wronged me.. there :( … on the contrary … :)

*looks at the bottom left corner of the ms word screen, only to realize that she has been blabbering about stuff unrelated to the original intent of the post*

Okayy ,,, now m too tired … but wanted to say a LOT!! ..

Now, somehow, just cant!

Okay …. A few years ago, on this planet called Earth, another creature was born ..

They named her something nice. But she is my Fairy God –Mother, guised as a mortal elder sister.

I somehow don’t feel like profiling her on a public forum … somehow, I think any lay person laying eyes on her profile sketch would not do justice to the meaning that the words hold for me … and I don’t want to desecrate the divine phenomenon that I have here.. with me.. for me .. always …

Okayy .. I’m not even talking about the pristine soul that this one is …

But today, as I was purchasing something at a sabziwala’s cart on my way home (struggling to stand on my two feet … I am SUFFERING from fever remember*shoots a warning look if the reader had dared forget maintaining the understanding-sympathy look while reading this post*!!)

Well, suddenly .. I saw this really tiny girl … clad in modest clothing (the kind that wears off by extensive use, and is then passed on by the Indian Patron families to their domestic help et al) … this girl came out of nowhere, and broke down into really loud sobs, tears rolling down her already stained (with malnourishment and impoverishment ) face … I wondered what was wrong .. looking around curiously for maybe the Dad (at first, my hunch was that she was the sabziwale uncle’s daughter ) … well, he kept on loading and unloading sabzi nonchalantly, indifferently, as though the girl, her heart wrenching sobs, and bucketsload of tears did not even exist!

The little girl cried. Louder. Tears streaming down her face in spates! … And .. dunno what struck me inside.. I wanted to walk up to her, just hug her and ask her why she was crying… I tell you, it was so moving that had it been a more worth-her-space-on-this-earth creature in my place, they would have bought her a bar of Temptations to just stop her from crying.

She pressed herself against the door of a car … crying ..to no avail .. a few seconds later … she started mouthing (at the universe, I presume coz none of the bystanders had even noticed her presence, let alone be an audience to her sobs!) .. she mouthed “mummy..mummy” … helplessly ..

In a tone .. that yearns for clinging …

Clinging on to somebody or something , for help…. For support … for ..well … for just Being., for holding on.

I considered asking the sabziwale uncle as to who this kid belonged to .. and just then, my gaze fell upon another girl (bit taller than the little girl, lets call her ‘Chotu’ :) ) … looking at her from a distance ..

She stopped, she looked hesitantly, and then she looked away. Mouthing something to … I can only guess.. to the rest of her playmates .. signaling to resume their play anyway .. this disturbance notwithstanding.

Here is what I think must have transpired:

Chotu and her playmates must have quarreled (maybe they had an argument over whether she was “out” and was to play the “Denner” {err..pardon me, I was never sure how that word is spelt!} .. or maybe they were not including her in the game for some weird reason .. maybe coz she was the youngest of them all (didn’t they have a term for it .. kachchi goli I think :) ) … I dunno!! Cud be anything!!) … But here she was …feeling wronged, hurt, ignored and bruised … crying out for someone who would tell her comforting things that any kid her age would want to hear …

Ignore them. Didis are being mean. We wont talk to them. Come let us play something else.

Koi baat nahi, chalo abba kar lo. Vaapas game khelo.. Main dekhti hoon kaise Den dene ko kehte hain yeh log aapse.

Oh For chrissake!! Anything …

Or maybe she just needed a pair of warm secure arms to be taken into- away from the bad, mad world of her playmates. And wipe her tears on somebody’s safe shoulders. Bury her face into an adult’s tummy, hold on tight, and just sob her heart away.

And yet, there she stood. All alone. Forgotten. Crying her throat hoarse.

Eventually, she seemed to have run out of tears .. (shamelessly worthless as I am .. all this while, I just looked – from the tall girl, to Chotu to the sabziwale uncle .. wondering whether it would be ’okay’ if I just walked up to her and talked to her!)

I took my packet, and walked back home. And I had just rung the bell, and stepped inside my home that my sis’ sickly lovey-dovey welcome calls (like a cerelac baby had walked out of the can into her room :-x )reached my ears *indicative of a good day at work for her* … as usual, I cracked a ruthless joke about her routine annoying habit and her sanity levels , to M (our domestic help) .. and we both rolled up with sarcastic laughter.

I walked straight to my room until Nanima and di’s calls/queries became so intolerably unavoidable that I gathered all strength to register my attendance in their room. Well, there was an ulterior motive of course! I had to tell them how sick I felt. How I couldn’t walk a step without pain. How I was messed up from head to toe, and all this, after a hard day at WORK! (err… didn’t bother to mention that all I did today in college .. was engage in another chat-session/nonsense- repartee exchange with Mamata Ma’am and Devanshu under the pretext of working for the Live Project—doing just a little bit of real ‘work’ in between breaks!)

My face (automatically, I swear!!) rearranged itself into a look of utter pain and agony.

And I got what I had wanted. Impromptu .. Oooooohhs and aaaaaahhs … looks of pity, empathy, checking of pulse .. patting of the head … (“Shruti! .. ur running a temperature, beta !”) ..as I put up a mock-brave front. (I had even begun on a mature note- whispering to my sis abt the fever, so that nanima would not get worried!.. but Well.. Lady Pink Panther that she is .. how could it have missed her antenna-like ears.. and well I wasn’t really complaining in my heart of hearts – the more sympathy, the merrier I am! *disgusting I know! .. but then—u shud have known me better—this is the Real Me!!*)

Poor M flung into action ... with her milk and tea and whatnots ..

I sighed, simpered … and returned to my room .. and then yelled out to my sister something abt the “internet not working” .. satisfied myself with a .. “ohhh ..too bad” from her end .. and then, just lay there .. And waited for my sis to walk in …

Well… she has her magic wand .. and I make full use of it. All I have to do is cling on to her. Well, just her being around .. the safe knowledge that she knows how screwed up I am .. works magic.

I just have to pour it all out – not even in words.. she just understands .. lets me be sad, melancholic.

She has “it will all be alright, Shruti” written all over her face. *** see note at the end

Poor my folks.. have never gotten a positive/encouraging reply to any of their queries about “how was my day” .. abt watsup with my life in general. It is always cribbing. It is always the worst that I could list.

And if it weren’t for this ventilation..

But for these sounding boards -- I would have ceased to exist– ages ago.

Ditto all the others in my family, whom I turn to .. for just about everything.

Surely, the greatest gift God can give someone is a set of loved ones. Everything else comes and goes.

What would have I done I can’t imagine (and sheeeeeesh I don’t WANT to! ) if these people weren’t around! ..

One shudders to think of those unfortunate souls who lose all their loved ones in life … or those who never have any. Those who must “seek” love, security , trust, and mutual bonding.. get bruised, bleed, and bandage the wound themselves and move on … all by themselves.

Oh … I’m sure the little girl I saw had some family. But I am not sure whether she had the comfort of those arms, the snug hug.. the reassuring smile that says “ it will all be alright” … how many times do you see really poor kids wailing unclaimed around a pile of garbage, sometimes a 2 foot girl, holding a .5 foot bundle of a baby brother by her side .. and walking … barefooted .. to nowhere ..

The mothers may be anywhere .. maybe begging, or lying by the footpath, in a heap of desolate despair, weakened by hunger, exploitation and have-not-ism.- The Universal fact of Motherly instincts beaten down badly by animal instincts for energy and material/spiritual hope.

We just don’t realize just about HOW lucky we are .. and keep taking our loved ones for granted … Well, I think that’s fairly alright … that is what god made them for ! .. (as long as, u take care of the ROI factor--- it is all good :) ) …

I just wish she had a Fairy Godmother too .. our Chotu! I wish tonight someone put her down to sleep, with a kiss on the forehead, or in a tight embrace .. even if they were sleeping on a mat on a floor of concrete..

I just hope, Chotu .. like many lucky ones like us .. too has some loved one(s) … that she too has hope to fight all despair.

Professor Dumbledore had always been right about the Healing Power of Love.. how it can fight all Evil on earth. It can. Oh, it sooo can. If only, we would come to realize its potential power to spread happiness, peace and calm. Cheers, Dumbledore. Cheers, Jo.

Cheers …

*** Okay .. get real .. there is also this very mean, insensitive side to her! – like the n number of times she stealthily ate my share of Maggie, and unapologetically fought with me when I protested, when she locked me in the bathroom when I was a hapless little kid (err.. not really hapless tho – I had a good mind to bang the door down with loud wails, until I heard my mum’s voice and employed plan Two instead—of sitting sadly in the corner, to strike notes of sympathy, and win the game :D :D), the legendary war in which she tore off my favourite shirt, over “who-gets-the-remote-control” .., and gave me proper red scratches across my neck :O :O to my mum’s horror! .. Or when we punched each other in the face once (a real loose Tooth for a loose Tooth- and thankfully, since both lost milk teeth, we could keep the story under wraps, to be safe from parental wrath).. or when I was this one year old innocent (YEAH! I was THAT too, once upon a time :D) baby, and she would put me to sleep (by borrowing my milk bottle kinds from mum and feeding me forcefully) whenever some uncles and aunties came over and got chocolates for the “Two little daughters in the family. ..” and would feed on my share while I slept, and innocently awoke to absolutely NO recollection of the choc that I had earned a while ago! *gawwd… I’m kinda liking her less and less now .. as I recollect all this..*… Ohhh the list is endless!! :-x

Latest Updates

Summer Internship::

Project guide Quit job! Even before we got a chance to meet (See, I told you- I can have disastrously damaging effects, without having to put in much effort. My mere presence/existence does the trick.)

15 days of pure waste. That’s what it all boils down to. Not surprising.

Let’s see what tomorrow has in store for me.

Disappointment:: More People Letting Down

Political correctness. Inertia. Indifference. Sadistic pleasure. Voyeurism. Cynicism.

Helplessness. Confusion. Moral/ Emotional dilemma.

These are some of the things one gets to see all around—writ large on people’s faces.

Sometimes, it evokes pity. Sometimes anger/ frustration/ hurt. Sometimes, questions.

And finally, one draws a blank.

Okay, no big deal. 21 years should teach one what to expect from life.. from people.

There is right, and there is wrong, and there is rightly wrong, and wrongly right.

There is My Right, Their Wrong (rarely, do people have it the other way)

Quoting Detective Riordan from The Genesis Code, ‘it all boils down to a big -So What?!’

Basicalllyyy …

This is not Food For Thought, but really, food for food-poisoning.

Unsettling revelations again

Well, not exactly ‘revelations’ but .. well, the same story retold from another perspective.

And somehow, leaving a bad taste in the mouth.

And well, I would like to leave a message here for anyone who has ever attached themselves to anyone, to the point of an inexplicable feeling of (emotional) loyalty towards them.

Maybe sometimes, it is OK to do a re-think, and ask yourselves a few questions:

Do They deserve it?

Do they deserve it from You?

Would you expect the same from them?

What if they didn’t meet your expectations? Would you be hurt? Does it matter to you?

Does it matter enough for you to do a re-think on the attachment and loyalty?

For your own sake?

Is the ROI on this person enough to make you stay invested?

Andd… does your Investment in person A (a part of your ROI to them) cut unfairly into the ROI that you owe to person B?

(Please note that all these calculations are based on a natural presumption that all deals are based on fairness, honesty, transparency and justice)

*** see note at bottom

(Arps, that would be Return on Investment; Investment of your loyalty and attachment, now the returns may not have to be in similar terms- could be anything- learning, social security{if not emotional}, justice, etc )

So, if the ROI does not seem much, I would say, re-think as to whether you want to stay invested. Not ‘staying invested’ does not mean harbouring ill-will towards anybody, or giving a raw-deal. Be fair and just in all your dealings. And be fair to yourself. This analysis will help in many cases:

· You could be making forced (unsolicited or uninvited)-investments where you are not desired/appreciated, (and then when you dont get commensurate returns, you will find yourself complaining- when the other party never desired a deal in the first place!)

Hence, you are being unfair to them, and hurting yourself unnecessarily.

· You could be making investments-on-solicitation i.e, where you have been indicated that your investment is eagerly sought, and desired and valued. And the ROIs could be low—maybe the other party does not care about it being a fairly equal deal. Your investment could be exploited for personal gains, with no intentions of reciprocal returns. You are harming yourself, and you have yourself to blame.

One would do well to remember (however crude it may sound..) that there is no such thing as “charity”, there is NO “free lunch”. Of course, this is a fact well-known to all, but acknowledged by very few. Now, before people jump to listing illustrations of unselfish acts and behavior, when I say, ‘free lunch’, it’s not just the tangible returns I refer to ..

There can be intangible, fair returns .. such as loyalty, moral and emotional support, kind-intentions, good-wishes, kind thoughts, timely help in times of need, among the other obvious ones.

Even Mother Teresa (a great, divine soul perhaps by all standards) was driven by fulfillment of needs of the Self. She derived maximum pleasure out of alleviating pain and loving the socially ostracized and abandoned, rather than .. say, she would have, if she were working as the Political Leader of a state struck by anarchy, and in dire need of an able leader who would lead them out of mess. Well, that would be a great social contribution too-for the good of others, to administer well, and run a state, manage the economy, politics etc such that people are well-fed and watered and clothed.

However, she adopted the other way. Coz that was what came naturally to her. What we choose to do in life is ideally, always something that matches that which gives us maximum happiness, n a feeling of achievement and self-fulfilment, with our physical and mental abilities.

In my opinion then, it makes little sense to hide behind the protection of abstract notions like “charity” , “self-less work for the larger cause of others” etc .. which really do not have any basis in reality, and then struggle with the complications and moral dilemmas that they throw at you.

And for the record, it would be a good idea to confess to ourselves that no rational order would equal “morality” with “self-less charity”

Why punish yourself for liking something well within your legitimate means, by way of earning the fruit (without unfairly eating into someone else’s share), and then giving it away, or giving it up – just coz For Some Reason THEY say It would Be the More Proper thing to do , even though it sooo does not feel like that, right now.

Basically, the idea was to convey that one must not fool oneself and others into believing that one’s loyalty, attachment etc for anybody is NOT an investment, with an eye on returns. Although the calculation is done implicitly, and subconsciously, and naturally, the point is that the ROI IS an important factor.

Why it becomes extremely important to recognize this, is that the lack of such honesty about the dynamics of human relationships leads to confusion, guilt, deception and unfair dealings, Truly IMMORAL and UNETHICAL behaviour (as people struggle between the innate, natural desire for fulfillment of self-interests, and the external dictum of how fulfillment of self-interest is bad, low-rated and socially undesirable/unacceptable.)

The fight between the internal Truth and the External Untruth/Lie results in manipulation, so that one can appear to adhere to the Socially acceptable External Untruth, while in reality fulfilling his/her own strong, internal, actual truthful desires (doing this in contradiction of the former of course!)

Half the problems that we see around us, with people – the disappointments, lies, deception, political scheming, plotting etc all stem from this lack of honestly to our own-selves (which naturally leads to dishonestly towards others)

*** I’m throwing these questions at the universe .. Okay, for the record, this outburst certainly has no connection whatsoever to my personal, first-hand experience.. it is an observation. And I wanted to note it down for the benefit of any soul, who might need to look at things this way.

And those who don’t understand what this means, now… well, it’s contextual, maybe one day when you experience it yourself, you will come back to this post .. and wish that you had understood the word of caution put up in this space :D

I was taken aback by something that transpired today. And wondered about the ignorance in which people live each day. About the Investments they make, and the ROIs which they take for granted! This is all I can do at my end. Let out a clue. God and good judgment should do the rest!

It’s nice to be nice.

It’s nicer to be nice to all by default- without prejudices or malice.

And It’s nicest to begin by being nice to yourself!

Remember the morning prayer at School..

Humko man ki shakti dena,

Man vijay karein,

Doosron ki jay se pehle,

Khud ko jay karein

Let us locate the temple of God within ourselves. This way, it will also ensure Good and clean acts and behavior from our end.

I am sacred. I am not to be defiled.

I am holy. I would never defile the sanctity of another.

Win-win situation for all!

Signing off …

Of Testimonials - I Hereby Delclare ....

I feel rather strongly about this issue, of course as I have Discussed earlier. (okay… maybe ‘monologued’ is the word I am looking for.. coz obviously, no one must have read that particular post – sans any spice or humour :D .. orr even for the lack of good food-for-thought therein)

But yeah, I do feel strongly about vouching for someone. And vouching for X,Y,Z qualities possessed by someone. No doubt, every one of us is unique, and possesses certain strengths, distinguishing personality traits that define us, and define us in a most beautiful manner.

It makes a whole lot of sense for us to appreciate the good in everyone we know. And it is definitely advisable to look out for the positives in every person, and acknowledge the same. This not only helps in reinforcement of desirable behaviours, traits but also helps us in developing a positive approach towards people, and encourages honesty and fairness in our dealings with them.

BUT to use, with casual indifference, blanket concepts in every other soul that you know, seems ridiculous. Not only does it dilute the potential utility of the tool (as a feedback mechanism, and as a source of reference for others), but it also dilutes the meaning and utility of words.

Subjectivity, and other influences such as social obligations, emotional sways etc are but natural. But tempering our testimonial with caution in this regard is certainly not a bad idea.

Anyyywayyyyyyyyyyyyyy ……

Who cares … I know anybody who’s checked in here, by mistake, does NOT. ..

Well, well, the main purpose of this post :D ..

In my previous blog, I had started the tradition of documenting all the testis that I have written .. coz they are nothing but character sketches of people I know … (esp: close to my heart, are the ones that DID come from the heart :) … without any external influence *ahem ahem* there I go again ) …

Well, There are three character sketches that I wrote recently, and that I certainly wish to document.

More so, coz two of these are stories, and weird ones at that … :D and shall always remain close to my heart …

Deepak … SIR ..

(In a bid 2 allay fears/anxiety amg juniors, aftr a rather intimidating placecom intro-speech by anotha SPC member) *a low decibel, seemingly innocuous voice spoke* “But, The placecom is very interesting. It’s not at all boring. It is quite fun. Not very boring. Not too difficult. It is very interesting--- “ n on n on n on
*basically, d SAME idea conveyed in 20 different yawn-inspiring ways *
At 1st glance, he came acros as sm1 upon whose innocent, tired shoulders the entire IMI Building stood, rather mercilessly- what with tht deceptively innocent ’hardworker- good guy’ expression pasted on his public face, which wud make any unsuspecting bystander go “ooooh.. god bless the poor soul, give

him some rest!!’ Somehow, he became an obvious target for my unclassy brand of humour. A FEW PJs in the same vein as above (with sum mimicry thrown in ) was ALL it took to spread the *inside * joke like wildfire … dun want to dwell 2 much on the mortifying (4 me) tale dat followed!

Here is the person I’m testifying for- something which he least requires (esp: 4m an utterly underqualified, lesser-mortal like me)- but something that his subtle n grossly underplayed Grandeur compels me to do!
DA (read: Devil’s Advocate- part two) in a nutshell: King of Biting Wit/Sarcasm, delivered in his inimitable soft yet precise manner (‘Kaat ke kat lete hain’), alwayyys calls a spade a spade (tho in words as sharp as a sweet little blade )-wont spare own kith n kin in this regard; extremely clear-headed, self-assured, honest, enterprising, Hard(LY?? )-working , a keen observer,objective in analysis of ppl/situations , rational , intelligent & Articulate (it’s been a pleasure to explore n create all kinds of theories with u ) ,full of wisdom-one pearl of wisdom that he dropped in a passing manner, n which I shall always preserve - “Just control your life, before it starts controlling you”..

anothr amusing soundbyte is his take on (Constructive) Politics- d cause of wich, he claims 2 champion(along wit his er.. Partner-in-crime );a natural leader, his excellent sense of humor coupled wit an acute sense of people-dynamics make him an unconventionally ideal HR person .. tho b warned, this mite not be vry apparent at 1st, 4 sum strange reason!
I hvn’t known him much- bt cn firmly stand by each adjctive dats listed up ther
Btw: I hope, 4 a CHANGE, what I’ve written makes sense 2 u .. cudnt hv been more explicit
In fact, I wudnt hv DARED 2 rite testis 4 Raghav Sir and Deepak .. err (adds as an afterthot ) SIR , 4 the sheer magnitude of their personalities, wich makes many mortals’ pale in comparison- if dis hadn’t been d only way of expressing my heartfelt gratitude-cum-apology and great regard for them (n their grace n kindness), as we bid adieu...
I realy hope that v live up 2(or go beyond) the standards that your batch has set before us,
Cheers n God Bless , Shruti

Raghav SIR. (period)

You know.. sometimes wen u do sumthing utterly stupid n embarrassing..n wish that u cud dig a hole(even better- a GRAVE) n crawl into it? Or tht u cud jus becum invisible 4 a moment? or run as fast as u can, in the opposite direction?
Well, I hv been thru all tht ..n more, everytime I ran into him in the past 1 year at IMI !...
I cringe in embarrassment to think of the 1st thing I uttered when I 1st saw him (in the Lean Mean “Ragger” Avtar- eyes looking daggers at the hapless freshers, shooting a volley of answer-less questions, with d typical anti-social look-(must mention the Gold Chain) - to boot ) ^uh-oh.. I actually hv d guts 2 redo the verbal version of the PERFORMANCE ^) .. I’d squeaked- in a nervous ‘I’ll-be-his-next-victim’ tone:
“Such people shouldn’t be allowed here!!” *CAN U BEAT THAT*

Wel, RELIABLE sources leaked out stuf like dis 2 him, n I shudder to think of dose summons tht followed “wat traits in me remind u of a GUNDA?” he calmly, kindly, asked me many a time, wit amused curiosity
Now do u understand the 1st three lines of the testi?!
* I wished to drown to death everytime…out of embarrassment! *
And in the months dat followed v got 2 c the other side of Him: his towering persona, his inimitable, disarming demeanour/signature style (he actually stopped to greet me everytime- just to beat the FEAR out of me- when he cud hv easily, in 1 stroke beaten life out of me ) ; his inherent, natural flair for people- acute understanding of people issues (n Politics); effortless leadership, methodical approach to everything .. a hard taskmaster -his passion 4 every task dat he undertakes is awe-inspiring, n yeah the surprise element – his appreciation (& flair)4 poetry …

Sumhow, I still fumble wit words in His Majestic presence- evry time I open my mouth (mostly in reply-wen I hv no option BUT to speak up) the thot dat crosses my mind is: “this is stupid, stupid…plzz stop talking, shruti!”
I hvnt known him much, but owed him an explanation of whatever l’ve ever learnt abt him from a VERY RESPECTFUL & SAFE DISTANCE .. altho, me riting a testi 4 him is like Chota mooh, badi baat And really, I cud sum up the entire 3-piece testi in one line :
Raghav Sir. Naam hi kaafi hai

In fct, I wudnt hv DARED 2 write testis for Raghav Sir and Deepak .. err (adds as an afterthot ) SIR , 4 the sheer magnitude of their personalities, wich makes many mortals’ pale in comparison- if dis hadnt been d only way of expressing my heartfelt gratitude-cum-apology and great regard for them (n their grace n kindness), as v bid adieu…
I really hope that v live up 2(or go beyond) the standards that your batch has set before us,
Cheers n God Bless … Shruti

******

Now, as we were discussing one day, and this question came up : If you can write 3-piece testis for people you barely know.. how much would you write for people u DO know …

And yeah… even I never realized that. Until the other day, when I sat down to write one for DA Sir ..

(I basically updated the 3-piece testi I’d written for him earlier.. )

So, here goes …. The lengthiest testi .. for my Favourite person on Orkut .. and one of the favourites in life, in general :) … PS. Although after I posted it… it almost embarrasses me .. the sheer length!!

Anywho..

Himanshu

This was long overdue & urgently so, Dear Devil's Advocate...4 d world shld no d phenomenon dat is Himanshu Jailkhani-frm an insider's point of view.D insider being ur err...Sister whom u had the cheek to ask upon meetin aftr 3 long yrs.."what have u grown in2?"...*rolls eyes*btw, if u shud know...my first impression ws tht u've grown in2 a well meaning --but slightly "frivolous" boy!(ha! all ur HP bashing contributed majorly towards this of course)..Butttt..today, I am actually proud of the person that u have grown in2( i myt be the only one in the family tho!! no jk..v al no u enjoy a vry wel desrvd high status amg al d kids). Self-confessed libertarian--in his fanatasy world..."evry1 CAN/SHUD be free to do EVRYTHING...unless u can rationalize against it in terms of anything except MORALS"...so i found myself rationalising with him "why cannibalism is NOT GUD/RITE..." amng othr weird things..but these r nt silly theories of his--its becoz he believes in Ethical Nihilsm(c, did u know ur no freak bt actually

a sophisticated philosopher?) Outwardly, he is a conformist- n a real good one at dat.1 of the beter human beings i hv known in al my lyf(wich is not much tho).Vry rational, sensitive, a thinker, cool as mint--u have to be a monster to get in2 his bad books--a thoro gentleman( i wil quote 4m our li'l sis' "bhaiya chalisa"--has immense respect for women)..nvr loses his cool or raises his voice, great sense of (non-offensive) humor--excelllllent timing..depending on ur perspective of course-his best one was outside our granny's ICU ward at 2 at nite! Verry humble-can suffer fools politely, if not gladly(1 of the favorite preys of "plss-stop-talking-shruti"-wil try all antics to make her STOP TALKING e.g plugging in his earphones, snoring loudly etc except ASK me to shut up(m not dumb,bro,tho i no i luk it ;)), Vry str8frwrd, bt d only reason he mite hold bck frank opinions is tht he is tooooo sweet to hurt any1’s feelings (except his mum’s – tho she gets EVEN :D – their acid- exchange is so much fun 2 watch!)

Is a real ROCKSTAR of a brothr(nope, no ref. 2 the venture called Blown Marrow [:P] –n so what if our li’l sis asked him once -petrified after watching a performance video “Bhaiya, *err-gulp*u guyz hvnt played in public naa?” lolz[;)]) ... *seriously senti mode now* You, of all ppl do not hv 2 ASK me 4 a testi Sada. I love u loads, n owe u loadssss-er still! He is Alwayys just a gtalk-ping away! .. whether I am sad, mad, in tears, happy, exhilarated, in a fix, in dat “I dun want to do mba” mode, or in my “u-know-what ..” mode, check-this-thing-I-need-feedback-on’ mode …WHENEVER I ping him .. he answers back widout fail, patiently, calmly, evil-ly, sarcastically, humorously, wisely, affectionately‘-- oh just the perfect thing to suit the situation… he has this magic wand … and is the reason for many smiles .. both within (n outside) our family [J] …… n d best part—he expects nothing in return!I hv alwys just TAKEN 4m him.. n the only return-paymnts must be my force-fed-stories, so dat doesn’t count!!

I stil rem the day when I ws almost broken- wit my first stint wit d real-world-outside, at IMI … u dun evn know, u loon, what an angel u wre 4 me dat night [:)] .. He helped me ‘DISCONNECT’ (er.. he actually suggested dope as an option, didn’t ya? [:P] ..ookkk .. weird sense of humor- runs in r genes ) .. &Oh gawdd… is so well-cultured, (*yuck*) tht his knowledge n sensitive understanding of so many “home/family/household-related” things put me – 1 of d The Daughters in the family, to shame, with my utter ignorance, n uncultured traits.! On d other hand!! *beats me HOW!* .. manages this very super-cool-rockstar-like lifestyle with friends.. (m seriously worried abt THE JOINTS tho, bro .. *raises brow* ) … has GOOD grey material (strictly non-academic, but with strongly intellectual overtones) … tho I wish he wud spend some more time with books too .. although, it’s too late now ..*sigh* .. Andd.. a/c 2 li’l sis, he used to look like a Pig 4 years ago *what?- they shud know the facts!*.. tho dunno how,

no such traces can be found now.. (err.. on d contrary, at present, maybe thx 2 ur genes, DA Sir,but, I wud more-than-OKAY ur appearance .. n that’s huge certification[:)]) altho..can reallyyy play d Devil's Advocate in every debate( u can have a LOT of mentally/intellectually stimulating convos with him)...with tht all-knowing..stupid, "wise" smirk on his face....wen u find u cant shut him up...here's a mantra...tell him ..."it's alrite, maybe ur rite....NOT A PROBLEM (COMMA)MATE"...watch him go red in the face, ask him why ;)..n sit back n enjoy ur victory... sorry cudnt keep it short yet again...signing off ...please-stop-talking-Shruti

PS. Tell ur Boss Lucifer DA, Thanks but NO THANKS! LOoove is the LAST thing I need *pukes*

And LAST but certainly NOT the least!! ... Thanks a dozen for checkin in, Healer Geller !!!
You cannnnnnot imagine how thrilled I am :) :) :) ... was going to declare a 'Katteee' anytime now .... coz of your inaction for so long :( .... And yeah... The same old girl here(even worse than what u saw !!) ... and I do miss those lectures :( ....

Cheeerrs !! (no cheers for Arps *folds arms-not talking*)

To the Raised-Eyebrows of the World ..

You know, I was just surfing the net … a lot of things … moving from some stuff on wind turbines, to AC generators, to analysis of Rank Order Scaling (thx to the curiosity generated while constructing the questionnaire for Divs’ research project , “Job satisfaction in the NGO sector’ :D *met her after AGES! – n still cant get over the goody-goody feeling* ... ) anyhow..

So..was doing all that, when I suddenly remembered having read this newspaper headline the other day: JK Rowling contemplated suicide while struggling as a divorced, single mother. (!!! )

I’d made a mental note to read up on it..but that had slipped my mind (umm…or whatever rudimentary substitute I have for The normal Human Mind)

Well, it just struck me, a while ago, and I keyed in these words … and Lo! U had innumerable pages listed in a second. I clicked on the first article wherein JKR confessed to having been severely depressed, and expressed her gratitude towards her doc who saved her life through Congnitive Behavioural Therapy (In a nutshell, this technique basically identifies those assumptions, beliefs, thoughts, behaviours etc that give rise to debilitating negative emotions leading to depression in the patient, and seeks to help replace those with other positive, self-helping alternatives. This would also involve overcoming avoidance of certain activities due to fear of failure etc)

JKR states that she is happy to discuss her depression to challenge the stigma associated with the condition.

"I have never been remotely ashamed of having been depressed. Never,” she says.

"What's to be ashamed of? I went through a really rough time and I am quite proud that I got out of that.”

Considering the stature that she enjoys in public, and her huge fan following, the fact that The Lady can come out in the open to discuss her own mental disease(n I use the term ‘disease’ on purpose – to rub in the fact that it is something not very socially-palatable), should definitely go a long way in helping many others confront their own problems, or those of their near and dear ones, and to seek medical treatment for the same.

BTW: I recall Vikram Seth coming out to declare that his sexual orientation is ‘Bisexual’- which unfortunately, many prudes or ‘confused-systemists’ greeted with cynicism or outright outrage. The Confused- Systemists are a breed, in my observation, who seek solutions to all problems in the world in the argument that “The System is Supreme- it must prevail, and the established order must not be disturbed in the slightest! The logic, I believe, is that all parts of a system work in harmony with each other, and maintain the overall wellbeing of the system. Thus, one part diverges from the rules laid down, and the system comes to a halt.

Just like a living organism: If the heart starts beating at a different rate one fine day, then obviously, the system that is the human being will suffer. However, the logic is flawed- coz, such deviations may result in illness leading to death in an organism- coz the organism is not dynamic- it cannot change its morphology over its lifespan. A person thrown into water will not develop gills top breathe, no matter how long he manages to stay put there. However, Societies are dynamic systems in every respect. When a change is introduced in the system, the society does not die (except in rare cases of wiping out of an entire civilization- by a catastrophe or massacre, as was attempted by Hitler-wiping out the Jewish race from the face of the earth-)

Societies CHANGE. And that makes all the difference in the world. A people who use stones to kill, capture food, give them a bow and an arrow/ spear – which they can use to kill each other more effectively, wage greater, more elaborate and bloody wars against each other.. well they do all that, but that’s not all they do. And, in effect, they end up doing a lot many more constructive things that they did prior to the introduction of the newer tools and weapons. They donot wipe each other out, as would have seemed possible- the population only swells in size!

Okay, a better illustration. A Society that endorses Polygamy – Such as ancient India. You introduce concepts such as Monogomy, sanctify fidelity to a single life partner, and what you get as a result is not Confusion, Chaos, etc etc but a restructured order: A system which accommodated for the changes, as and when the need arose, and as far as it could stretch, and of course, over a reasonable period of time.

The Confused- Systemists (confused coz they are not very sure about the premise of their logical framework themselves, as I will explain later..) insisted (and here I’m referring to those my age, whom I had the fortune of interacting with ) that Mr. Seth was One, seeking cheap publicity by lending his name to a controversial cause [ahem to that, coz here is the Guy who retorted with a “Behave yourself. Why should I discuss my relationships with you? “, to a fan’s query – “ why don’t you ever tell us about your girlfriend”, some three years ago.] . Two, even if he is ‘Abnormal’, he shouldn’t go around wearing that fact like some kinda ‘badge of honour’, the ConSysts hold.

**** I had started writing this post some days ago. Resumed today… after a loooong break.

Well, to cut a long story short … (coz the sentiment that this issue evokes will run into pages!)

To those consysts, I’d say (like I did the other day, though I don’t think much came out of it) that people like Vikram Seth donot require / desire sensational publicity of that kind and do very well (thank you!) without it.

Secondly, the reason someone of his class and stature comes out and takes a stand on a social issue is NOT to flaunt their “uniqueness” – one that is bound to invite more of ostracism than respect and inclusion, but to lend weight and credibility to the cause. (in this case, Same-Sex issues.)

In the civilized world, this is termed as “socially responsible behavior” on the part of those who have the privilege of voice and vote, and the advantage of visibility, credibility, and resources.

And why do we forget that one need not have be a direct victim, to feel actively for a cause.

You need not be a woman to feel and speak against rape, molestation, gender biases.

You need not dwell in slums and live in abject poverty, to think of and act on measures for poverty alleviation and promoting literacy.

You need not belong to the socially ostracized (unrecognized) class of eunuchs/ homosexuals/ mentally/physically challenged, untouchables and the like, to sympathize with their cause.

(and yes, the clubbing has been done on purpose because there is really not much difference in the nature of these problems.)

This is because you never know when you may find yourself on the other side of the fence…

Desperately yearning for help/support, for a friend, child or parent, from the “normal” people who constitute the majority in this world, with little tolerance for the “abnormal” ones.

A similar hue and cry was raised when JKR declared that ‘Professor Dumbledore was Gay’. Some were offended at the fact that he was “gay” and therefore abnormal, while others merrily jumped to he conclusion that JKR was doing this for cheap publicity- letting slip “scandalizing bits” about the Star of her epic.

I will quote the excerpt from the interview with her, where she first spoke up about this fact of her Epic character’s life.

The way I see it, she had held back this fact about Dumbledore (and yes it’s a FACT coz it was a character close to her heart, and vividly clear to the writer right form the beginning) for so long, to avoid any such unnecessary slander ..and spoke up after so long, only when prodded … and provoked by a direct question (not answering this one without all the facts would have amounted to lying!)

Q. Did Dumbledore, who believed in the prevailing power of love, ever fall in love himself?

JKR: My truthful answer to you... I always thought of Dumbledore as gay. [ovation.] ... Dumbledore fell in love with Grindelwald**, and that that added to his horror when Grindelwald showed himself to be what he was. To an extent, do we say it excused Dumbledore a little more because falling in love can blind us to an extent, but he met someone as brilliant as he was, and rather like Bellatrix he was very drawn to this brilliant person, and horribly, terribly let down by him. Yeah, that's how i always saw Dumbledore. In fact, recently I was in a script read through for the sixth film, and they had Dumbledore saying a line to Harry early in the script saying I knew a girl once, whose hair... [laughter]. I had to write a little note in the margin and slide it along to the scriptwriter, "Dumbledore's gay!" [laughter] If I'd known it would make you so happy, I would have announced it years ago!

JKR --The Potter books in general are a prolonged argument for tolerance, a prolonged plea for an end to bigotry, and I think it's one of the reasons that some people don't like the books, but I think that's it's a very healthy message to pass on to younger people that you should question authority and you should not assume that the establishment or the press tells you all of the truth.

**Grindelwald was an exceptionally bright (like himself) friend of Dumbledore’s, in his young days. He later went on to become a powerful, evil dark wizard, by exploiting his powers for negative use. It was Dumbledore, who took it upon himself to kill him in a duel and end his atrocities, years later.

Ohhh..this brings me to the real reason for this post! …. I was reading this article on how Vatican is up in arms in JKR again (the same old hogwash about the books being anti-christianity, promoting witchcraft, sorcery etc! ) .. and was quite amused by the responses to the article, posed by readers who took well aimed digs at this prudish behavior of the Vatican. Some of them had me in splits!!

Here is that article:

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2008/01/15/nharry115.xml

and here are the absolutely lol-evoking comments!

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2008/01/15/nharry115.xml#comments

Arps, enjoy reading! :D

The Rime of a Professional Goof-ball...

“Ah! Well, a day! What sickly mess,

In my own face, I flung..

Instead of the Cross,

the Albatross,

Around my neck was hung..” - Shruti F.

I’m calm, inside. Well, in a way. Despite the Tempest, which I donot believe will die down, for a long time to come. It’s one of those rare moments when you are stared in the face by an ugly Monster, just as you had anticipated all along. You keep going back in time, and keep wondering as to what you could have done differently… Coz, you were forewarned yourself (by virtue of simple logic), and you had sounded the tocsin aloud well in time.

So, you keep wondering, (frustration spiraling with each passing second) as to what you would do, if you had to back in time, and do it all over again. And for a long time… you helplessly think .. NOTHING, I could have done NOTHING !

How do you change things to avoid a certain outcome, having been perfectly aware of its causes the last time it occurred, well in advance, and having done everything to avoid it?

What do you do, when some things look beyond your control, but must be reined in for good?

After hours and hours of restless deliberation and a puke-y feeling welling up inside me, there is only solution that has I could come up with: Tying up all loose ends NO MATTER WHAT. I don’t care How I do it. But I must.

It is when you get stuck on the HOWs of things, that the task seems unachievable.

The mantra should be: What do I need to do? .. any which way…

And, finally, If I had to go back in time, could I do things differently? Yes, Probably.

Although it’s easier said than done, it’s certainly not impossible!

And now, looking at the bright side of this recent experience (though I would have rather seen this bright side in some more congruous circumstance!), I saw sanity/ rationality incarnated! Glimpses of the rare-to-come-across phenomenon of rationality, faced me, though unfortunately, in such inopportune circumstance! … But, maybe, the circumstances had to be such, for one to appreciate the cherished quality.

All this while, I was grappling with issues: While I did not doubt the functionality of certain fundamental operating principles in nature that I believe make most sense, it had become a struggle to keep faith, while finding evidences of apparent contradictions day after day. It was like engaging in monologues with dead walls- Ten feet high. Cold. Impenetrable.

Even when it was not a monologue, it was a gross distortion of a dialogue. For, a dialogue is supposed to leave you feeling more enlightened, better informed, maybe with a difference of opinion, but with a good understanding and appreciation of the difference.

In fact, it has recently come to my notice, that most people fear/ avoid a dialogue of any kind. Things must not be said, facts must not be stated, most of the times.. rather, one would prefer to vent their emotions/feelings/opinions in a snide manner, behind closed doors, behind turned backs – does this mode of communication provide some sort of sickly pleasure or satisfaction, that it has become the preferred mode of communication for most people? And, perhaps, even shield one from the brutal nature of reality, which would inevitably be revealed in any communication which calls for a fair exchange of unbiased facts?

Which brings me back to some thoughts I had noted months ago, and shared with Arps immediately :D …. In a similar context… let me compile all of this together, and put down those here in this post…

We are strange, aren’t we..

How many of us have NOT had those moments of

“Nobody understands me “… orr an even more amusingly interesting one,

“nobody knows ME- the real me!!” with a hint of smug pride and satisfaction, a non-verbal smirk at The World Outside that sees me as it wants to see me, and not as What I Actually Am (plss donot miss the pun-ification in this piece!!)

Kindly Note: The Real Me is invariably the “all knowing, wise, a higher Me! :P ” (*rolls up eyes, in the sorry-ness of this universally clichéd thinking *)

On the other hand, We want the same “ignorant” people to vouch for us!!

We want the world that knows us, to tell the rest of the world -that does not know us, that we are good people to know. Okay, that’s fairly simple logic. But waitamniit!!... by our own conceived logic n conviction, isn’t it, that the world that does claim to have figured us out, does not in fact, know us at all!!

So what do we want them to tell the Others , if they have got their facts wrong?

And Oh yes, we do!! … Boy, do we!! ……

And this kind of behavior is just so beautifully highlighted by this concept of Orkut Testimonials… and testi-trading too….

Apart from the obvious purpose of serving as an ego/morale –booster … enhancing ur orkut social status a bit, taking u for a well earned ego trip while the 1024 characters last (particularly well earned if u got it ‘in return ‘for one written by you :D ) , one can argue that it serves as a potential tool for feedback – from people you know- except , it’s just the kisses n hugs n thank-you-for-being you’ s that are conveyed – the “Do u know how you hurt me when u do such n such thing” or “I wish you were a little less of a back-stabber” are completely omitted (I mean of course, a TESTIMONY is not supposed to carry such info- that wud defeat its very purpose!)

So I guess at some point, it is reduced to this superficial, cosmetic exercise-

A reproduction of our equally superficial n cosmetic ‘real’ lives…

Where people smile meaninglessly (outwardly, well-meaningly), pointlessly (outwardly, pointedly) as they pass each other in the corridors, mouthing inane “Watsups” …as if they care a fig—ironically, often widout pausing to wait for an answer… and raise brows in disapproval, disgust or with simple uninterested contempt, that seems to be the sole fuel driving human existence these days….this eye-brow raising is done behind turned backs, behind shut doors .. where come out the “Do u know how you hurt me when u do such n such thing” or “I wish you were a little less of a back-stabber” – n this assumes the shape of intro/retrospection or (n this is bad!) ,.. Gossip is the easy substitute for dialogue, but far less effective and efficient!

Although, the other day, I remember having this discussion with the-other-DA (hehe.. yeah, not the original DA Sir .. :D).. and was posed this question : Are testimonials not just THAT? – testimonials?? .. So, what is the problem with this ..?

Well, My issue is not with the fact that people vouch/testify for each others’ credentials .. but that doing it in an extremely random and arbit manner (one that translates into you scratch my back, I scratch your back) just demeans the whole purpose of testimonials, and dilutes the authenticity/potential utility of this tool!

Anyhow, coming back to the original thread of this post…

It has been a breath of fresh air for me! ..I have almost gotten a new lease of life …

And here I’m talking about my recent encounter with some of the most rational, sensible beings of my age. It’s funny, how, with some of us, the most normal, routine, non-issues become bones of ugly contention, thriving on the irrational egotism/ second-rater-ism . While, with some (very few) others, the most difficult of impasses seem like a cake walk. And the facilitating principle, always, is a rational straightforward dialogue.

It amazed me, how a situation which had the potential of snowballing into something extremely ugly and unpleasant, leaving a bad taste in the mouth for everyone involved, resolved itself beautifully, simply and logically. Not to say that it was an easy job for any of the parties, but the sincere determination to strike at the root cause, instead of anybody’s dignity, respect or intelligence, did the trick.

What would have been an uphill task, turned out to be a great learning experience, and not a bitter one at that!

And it was just another strong evidence of how great minds are not bred/ architected in great buildings/under great banners… they are bred by and within their own selves, by their own nature, choices, and perhaps circumstances.

I would like to use this space to offer a word of thanks, and a small prayer to these strangers, whom I may never see again, but will never manage to forget either.

I’m not talking about saintly souls, angels, or good Samaritans. This post is a toast to the simple, rational, First raters of this world (a rare species by all standards). And, to the indomitable, honest spirit of awe-inspiring excellence, that they epitomize.

Cheers ! ….